Regular readers will know that the Fu’Gutty life leads to me knowing a fair few people who exhibit similar proclivities to crap old cars..
One such chap is my mate The Moog. By day a super duper sensible lecturer at a further education college, he becomes a voracious consumer of shite old cars by night.
Tonight was one such evening.
I was summoned to the Batcave in my Robinesque Fabia – and charged with pounding the mean streets of Bingley in hot pursuit of The Joker..
Ah yes, The Joker. Sworn enemy of Batman and a known deviant in the anti-roll bar department, this Burgundy bruiser bore a passing resemblance to the Blomqvist piloted 3rd place car in the 1996 Network Q rally.
Yes, The Joker is a 1997 Skoda Felicia 1.3i. Despite not having the powerhouse 1.6, these 1.3 mpi engined beasts are willing performers, and I had fond memories of my brother’s one.
Initial impressions for The Moog were less than favourable – sloppy handling, a veer to the right when braking and the incessant din of tappets made for a less than auspicious first impression.
But I was prepared and ready to go on the attack!
First strike- apply Batflation devices to the 4 rings of doom! Rendering them full to 32psi of handling gas.
Strike two- gloop the Gubbins in the engine bay with Batfords finest 5w30 super shiny synthetic oil. Once more silence prevailed near Keighley.
The Joker was tamed.
Back to Gotham we toddled, and The Joker was incarcerated in the Batcave once more..
The Moog had even taken a shine to it by this point. mission accomplished!